The Heckle Report
- Thread starter The Heckler
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Pearl
THIS CHANGES EVERYTHING
Don Madson got your 360 on film, two slides: http://dmadson.photoreflect.com/store/Orderpage.aspx?pi=0HS2003T000605&po=605&pc=1102
sorry not buying them for you though
sorry not buying them for you though
The Heckler
You bring new meaning to the term SUCK
the picture even says PROOF PROOF on it.
The Heckler
You bring new meaning to the term SUCK
Well, I reg'd for both days of Supercross this weekend. I've been off the bike since I raced Sunday, I'm planning on running some cross drills in the dark tonight at a park just to shake down my mounts, and god knows I need to practice clipping in for starts.
I'm racing the 2/3/4 field and it looks like a lot of really fast people that I don't normally race with are showing up.
yay bikes.
I'm racing the 2/3/4 field and it looks like a lot of really fast people that I don't normally race with are showing up.
yay bikes.
not under appreciated......
The Heckler
You bring new meaning to the term SUCK
Race 23 - Supercross Cup Day 1
23, haha.
Last weekend really took a toll on me physically and mentally. Racing an 'A' race after a weekend off kicked me in the teeth then my struggle to stay with Matt and Stephen on Sunday really just took a lot out of me.
Thanks to a stomach bug I was off the bike almost all week. I got 20 minutes of mounts and corning in on Thursday but nothing fitness maintenance wise. I was almost ready to call it quits for the year. Reg closed Wednesday at noon and I had to make a choice earlier then I wanted, and gamble feeling well enough to race.
I'm happy I reg'd.
Today was a really lazy morning. The timeline, however, was perfect and we got to the venue at 9:30 as planned. The first pre-ride was terrible. The ground was frozen solid. 45 minutes later some spots began to soften and greasy mud started to break through.
Zach and I hung in the car. We pinned and applied embro in the front seat of his Ford Focus. In doing so we both managed to get "surprise embro" all over high contact surfaces including but not limited to:
seats
center console
shift lever
60-90 degrees of the steering wheel
Zach's cell phone
Since it is "surprise embro" I'm sure more will be found at a later date.
It's no secret that bicycle racers have some really putrid stomachs. The nerves rip apart the insides of almost ever person that lines up. How do I know it's not just me? The condition of the portajohns, or jawns if your from around Philly.
(graphic warning for content of next "section")
REWIND TO PROVIDENCE 2013.
Last year I found the worst portajohn I've ever seen at Divine Providence. Upon entering the small plastic shed I was greeted with a sight that made me almost cry laughing.
Set aside next to the seat was a small frame pump covered in feces. My mind quickly ran through a couple scenarios in which this may have been the result of.
1. "Oh no my frame pump fell out of my jersey pocket and into the toilet"
-This would imply someone still reached in and removed a pump covered in human feces. After inspecting it thoroughly it was decided their $20 accessory could not be salvaged. It was then abandoned next to the seat.
2. "Wow, lucky I made it to the portajohn! I almost diarrhea'd my kit! Now where is that toilet paper?.. THEY'RE OUT OF TOILET PAPER!!! What do I have to wipe myself with????? 3 safety pins, my glasses and a frame pump..."
-This is the situation I want to be true. The poor bloke needed to make it to his race so he wiped himself with his pump. MacGyver? Not quite, but I will give him points for his efforts.
BACK TO SATURDAY 11/22/2014
Inside the left most portajohn by the food trucks was a mudslide of biblical proportions. Most people (usually) choose to deposit their waste in the toilet. Often men leave some pee here and there, but someone ripped a monstrous corn filled river directly to the right of the toilette opening. Right on top the the "seat basin."
To me this means one of 3 things.
1. Someone is a sociopath and gets off to shitting not in the toilet.
2. They were doing the 'ol hover and poop, and missed. Honest mistake? Maybe. "Sorry, my butt has a mean slice."
3. They were in such a rush they closed the door, dropped 'trow turned to sit but the clock struck midnight! The chariot turned back into a pumpkin and the "Cinderella" sprayed her/his feces at mach 12 all over the seat top.
I'm rooting for #3. However this happened it slightly edged out the great Providence frame pump debacle of 2013. Shortly after someone labeled the unit as "out of order."
Sorry, as Danny Devito once said in Always Sunny "Poop is funny."
RACE TIME
I wrote off doing well this weekend but was gifted a 2nd row call up. On the line it actually felt pretty warm. I took my coat off and wasn't shivering!
At the whistle I hit my pedal first try and was off! Damn it feels good to have a good start. Everything goes smoother when you're in the front. I was about 7th or so and dodged a yard sale on the 5th corner which separated my small front group from the rest of the field.
Every corner was a layer of grease mud on top of hard ground. I was not inspired by traction of the griffo/fango set-up but most people were in the same boat. Braaaaap'd around all race!
I settled in with a King Kog rider. He would gap me all of the straights and I would gain on the techy stuff.
We rode together the whole race and going into the sprint he put 10 lengths on me. He didn't stand on the pavement! I hesitated but then took off full bore after him. He had me by 1/2 a length over the line. I laughed about it and told him good race. He was a good wheel for me to chase.
Final result: 8/64 in the Cat 2/3/4 field. Very happy with this. Not writing off the season yet.
Day 2 tomorrow.
23, haha.
Last weekend really took a toll on me physically and mentally. Racing an 'A' race after a weekend off kicked me in the teeth then my struggle to stay with Matt and Stephen on Sunday really just took a lot out of me.
Thanks to a stomach bug I was off the bike almost all week. I got 20 minutes of mounts and corning in on Thursday but nothing fitness maintenance wise. I was almost ready to call it quits for the year. Reg closed Wednesday at noon and I had to make a choice earlier then I wanted, and gamble feeling well enough to race.
I'm happy I reg'd.
Today was a really lazy morning. The timeline, however, was perfect and we got to the venue at 9:30 as planned. The first pre-ride was terrible. The ground was frozen solid. 45 minutes later some spots began to soften and greasy mud started to break through.
Zach and I hung in the car. We pinned and applied embro in the front seat of his Ford Focus. In doing so we both managed to get "surprise embro" all over high contact surfaces including but not limited to:
seats
center console
shift lever
60-90 degrees of the steering wheel
Zach's cell phone
Since it is "surprise embro" I'm sure more will be found at a later date.
It's no secret that bicycle racers have some really putrid stomachs. The nerves rip apart the insides of almost ever person that lines up. How do I know it's not just me? The condition of the portajohns, or jawns if your from around Philly.
(graphic warning for content of next "section")
REWIND TO PROVIDENCE 2013.
Last year I found the worst portajohn I've ever seen at Divine Providence. Upon entering the small plastic shed I was greeted with a sight that made me almost cry laughing.
Set aside next to the seat was a small frame pump covered in feces. My mind quickly ran through a couple scenarios in which this may have been the result of.
1. "Oh no my frame pump fell out of my jersey pocket and into the toilet"
-This would imply someone still reached in and removed a pump covered in human feces. After inspecting it thoroughly it was decided their $20 accessory could not be salvaged. It was then abandoned next to the seat.
2. "Wow, lucky I made it to the portajohn! I almost diarrhea'd my kit! Now where is that toilet paper?.. THEY'RE OUT OF TOILET PAPER!!! What do I have to wipe myself with????? 3 safety pins, my glasses and a frame pump..."
-This is the situation I want to be true. The poor bloke needed to make it to his race so he wiped himself with his pump. MacGyver? Not quite, but I will give him points for his efforts.
BACK TO SATURDAY 11/22/2014
Inside the left most portajohn by the food trucks was a mudslide of biblical proportions. Most people (usually) choose to deposit their waste in the toilet. Often men leave some pee here and there, but someone ripped a monstrous corn filled river directly to the right of the toilette opening. Right on top the the "seat basin."
To me this means one of 3 things.
1. Someone is a sociopath and gets off to shitting not in the toilet.
2. They were doing the 'ol hover and poop, and missed. Honest mistake? Maybe. "Sorry, my butt has a mean slice."
3. They were in such a rush they closed the door, dropped 'trow turned to sit but the clock struck midnight! The chariot turned back into a pumpkin and the "Cinderella" sprayed her/his feces at mach 12 all over the seat top.
I'm rooting for #3. However this happened it slightly edged out the great Providence frame pump debacle of 2013. Shortly after someone labeled the unit as "out of order."
Sorry, as Danny Devito once said in Always Sunny "Poop is funny."
RACE TIME
I wrote off doing well this weekend but was gifted a 2nd row call up. On the line it actually felt pretty warm. I took my coat off and wasn't shivering!
At the whistle I hit my pedal first try and was off! Damn it feels good to have a good start. Everything goes smoother when you're in the front. I was about 7th or so and dodged a yard sale on the 5th corner which separated my small front group from the rest of the field.
Every corner was a layer of grease mud on top of hard ground. I was not inspired by traction of the griffo/fango set-up but most people were in the same boat. Braaaaap'd around all race!
I settled in with a King Kog rider. He would gap me all of the straights and I would gain on the techy stuff.
We rode together the whole race and going into the sprint he put 10 lengths on me. He didn't stand on the pavement! I hesitated but then took off full bore after him. He had me by 1/2 a length over the line. I laughed about it and told him good race. He was a good wheel for me to chase.
Final result: 8/64 in the Cat 2/3/4 field. Very happy with this. Not writing off the season yet.
Day 2 tomorrow.
Jeez man that was funny as hell. "butt has a mean slice" Gold, there.
Mountain Bike Mike
Well-Known Member
My mind immediately thought that someone wanted to show the audience that "said pump" was truly a piece of sh!t.
Mountain Bike Mike
Well-Known Member
Jeez man that was funny as hell. "butt has a mean slice" Gold, there.
Absolutely!!!
The Heckler
You bring new meaning to the term SUCK
Race 24 - Supercross Cup Day 2
24!
Sunday was an absolute treat. The high was only around 50 but man did it feel like 75!
Showed up at 9:30 again. Jersey Boy poppy bagel with butter and a vanilla coffee. FUEL OF KILLER B'S! Or at least this Killer B. I gave up my routine involving jells and gummies a few weeks ago. I don't care anymore, and I can't tell a difference during the race. If I remember I have a banana. I've heard for cross you shouldn't eat anything for 3 hours before the start and drink for an hour. Something about at the correct intensity none of it gets processed blah blah blah or something. My coach has no idea what he's doing. (I have no idea what I'm doing)
MUD!!!!
Anything that was frozen the day before was a full on grease slick. I prerode on Griffo/Fango and switch my front to the Lymus for a lil extra sumsumthin. This helped a lot.
Sunday's start was not as good as Saturday's. I was back a few more guys then I would have liked and had to work hard to get up where I should have been but it was salvageable. I settled in with Keith Garrison a.k.a. "#ipulledakeith" We were with a few other guys but the group pretty quickly separated. For the glory of the story I'm going to say we dropped those fools, but I really can't remember.
Keith and I were riding really well together. We were switching pulls every 1/4 lap or so and had John K (also king kog) hot on our heels. This was the boggiest spot on the course:
With one to go it seemed like John was really starting to gain. I shifted into business mode and put myself into the hate cave. I ended up putting 10 seconds or so on Keith and almost caught the guy ahead of me. If I turned on the hate earlier maybe I could have finished a spot better but I would have to settle for 8th again.
Cool!
I had a coke, egg & cheese sandwich and an order of fries for lunch.
Matt <3 CX.
Beard report: You tell me.
This weekend is Baystate up in MA. Still undecided on NBX the following week.
Have a great Thanksgiving 'erry one!
24!
Sunday was an absolute treat. The high was only around 50 but man did it feel like 75!
Showed up at 9:30 again. Jersey Boy poppy bagel with butter and a vanilla coffee. FUEL OF KILLER B'S! Or at least this Killer B. I gave up my routine involving jells and gummies a few weeks ago. I don't care anymore, and I can't tell a difference during the race. If I remember I have a banana. I've heard for cross you shouldn't eat anything for 3 hours before the start and drink for an hour. Something about at the correct intensity none of it gets processed blah blah blah or something. My coach has no idea what he's doing. (I have no idea what I'm doing)
MUD!!!!
Anything that was frozen the day before was a full on grease slick. I prerode on Griffo/Fango and switch my front to the Lymus for a lil extra sumsumthin. This helped a lot.
Sunday's start was not as good as Saturday's. I was back a few more guys then I would have liked and had to work hard to get up where I should have been but it was salvageable. I settled in with Keith Garrison a.k.a. "#ipulledakeith" We were with a few other guys but the group pretty quickly separated. For the glory of the story I'm going to say we dropped those fools, but I really can't remember.
Keith and I were riding really well together. We were switching pulls every 1/4 lap or so and had John K (also king kog) hot on our heels. This was the boggiest spot on the course:
With one to go it seemed like John was really starting to gain. I shifted into business mode and put myself into the hate cave. I ended up putting 10 seconds or so on Keith and almost caught the guy ahead of me. If I turned on the hate earlier maybe I could have finished a spot better but I would have to settle for 8th again.
Cool!
I had a coke, egg & cheese sandwich and an order of fries for lunch.
Matt <3 CX.
Beard report: You tell me.
This weekend is Baystate up in MA. Still undecided on NBX the following week.
Have a great Thanksgiving 'erry one!
The Heckler
You bring new meaning to the term SUCK
Registration Fees - Please share your opinion!
We are down to the last 1-1/2 or 2 weekends of racing.
Yesterday I signed up for Baystate in Sterling, MA. Registration for the Cat 3 race increased Friday 11/21/14 from $40 each day to $50. I’m not happy about that cost but I’m an addict and I already said I would be racing.
What I find really terrible is that Cat 4/5 and Woman’s Cat 4 are both $45 pre-reg. There is still a day of reg fee of $10. With a one day license it could theoretically cost someone trying out this sport $70 for a 30 minute race.
I emailed the promoter to ask why the race was so expensive and received a reply explaining that the cost increase was to try and encourage early sign ups. I’m obviously bummed about how expensive the race is for myself but I’m mostly disappointed with how expensive the beginner classes are. I feel like this is not good for the community.
Any thoughts?
We are down to the last 1-1/2 or 2 weekends of racing.
Yesterday I signed up for Baystate in Sterling, MA. Registration for the Cat 3 race increased Friday 11/21/14 from $40 each day to $50. I’m not happy about that cost but I’m an addict and I already said I would be racing.
What I find really terrible is that Cat 4/5 and Woman’s Cat 4 are both $45 pre-reg. There is still a day of reg fee of $10. With a one day license it could theoretically cost someone trying out this sport $70 for a 30 minute race.
I emailed the promoter to ask why the race was so expensive and received a reply explaining that the cost increase was to try and encourage early sign ups. I’m obviously bummed about how expensive the race is for myself but I’m mostly disappointed with how expensive the beginner classes are. I feel like this is not good for the community.
Any thoughts?
Mountain Bike Mike
Well-Known Member
I haven't found anything in cycling where I caught myself thinking - damn, that's cheap. In fact, it's quite the opposite. This is an expensive hobby and it gets way more expensive when you get involved with racing. So - you kind of expect it to be expensive and find great feeling of enjoyment when you get a deal.
I do know of many people that can't afford to race but want to.
I do know of many people that can't afford to race but want to.
It probably costs an arm and a leg to rent the venue. I stress every race every year, worrying if we're going to get the numbers to support the race. Cross is really bad. With 2 days to go we're still well in the red. So I understand the promoter wanting to ensure people sign up to make sure they don't lose money. If they were assured X people, it would be a non-issue.
Thing is this. If the weather sinks and people just stay away, that could be $1-2k lost, and sometimes that will come out of the promoter's pocket, since many clubs run with absolutely zero budget. And GOD FORBID if we don't pay out, so we have to put aside $500-$1000 for that alone. We ran real low on money one year at the HSCX, and were not able to pay out the As. You would have thought we jammed a cue stick up Mother Teresa's ass the way some of these racers (and their parents) reacted. Actually, just the guys. Women didn't care.
Those are random thoughts. Having said that $45 is highway robbery. This venue must be brutally expensive. IMO if you have to pay $4-5k to rent the place, either shit-can the race or move it.
Yes - expensive - but the point is right on. It is way too expensive for the casual person supporting their local club, as this may be the only race they do.
Take the $$ from the people racing for $$ -
of course there are high cat people racing in the cat 5 cx cause they can....lame. They should pay up. (or pay to race down?)
----
to follow up Norms post for attendance, and go off the point (which i do like to do)
just randomly throwing these out there..
Clubs are out to make $$ - or at least cover, cause they are a club - shouldn't there be a couple sponsors that see it as an investment?
and yes, a successfully run event on the correct weekend will generate its own follow-on business. kinda like people go to see the mets when they are winning.
Pi in the sky:
Are there other sources of income? ie ($100 sponsor get a sign for their business just down the road, and a coupon handed out at registration - ie food, massage, bowling alley, showers)
can the call-up rules be "bent" - call-up strictly on order of sign-up? or would that just piss people off?
Prereg includes coupon for local lodging/other?
50% refunds on no-show
free event pictures for social media (Luke & Don work off a different model for the low res stuff if they are up for that - yes, I know Luke has donated to the event - but it is never advertised beforehand)
since i'm just throwing darts here, i'm sure alot of this has been thought thru.
Take the $$ from the people racing for $$ -
of course there are high cat people racing in the cat 5 cx cause they can....lame. They should pay up. (or pay to race down?)
----
to follow up Norms post for attendance, and go off the point (which i do like to do)
just randomly throwing these out there..
Clubs are out to make $$ - or at least cover, cause they are a club - shouldn't there be a couple sponsors that see it as an investment?
and yes, a successfully run event on the correct weekend will generate its own follow-on business. kinda like people go to see the mets when they are winning.
Pi in the sky:
Are there other sources of income? ie ($100 sponsor get a sign for their business just down the road, and a coupon handed out at registration - ie food, massage, bowling alley, showers)
can the call-up rules be "bent" - call-up strictly on order of sign-up? or would that just piss people off?
Prereg includes coupon for local lodging/other?
50% refunds on no-show
free event pictures for social media (Luke & Don work off a different model for the low res stuff if they are up for that - yes, I know Luke has donated to the event - but it is never advertised beforehand)
since i'm just throwing darts here, i'm sure alot of this has been thought thru.
Jelly of the folks still racing. I bruised/broke a rib JRA over the weekend so my season is done.
Norm and I have fretted over the cost thing a lot in the past couple years. Venues are getting harder and harder to secure as cross begins to eat it's own tail. Turns out that a lot of parks don't like the idea of having a bunch of skinny dorks tearing up their grass (despite the fact that it always comes back like new by springtime). As such you have to take what you can get, which often means paying a lot for venue rental.
To add to Norm's maths: Baystate has averaged right around 400 racers over the past few years (200 a day). Assume venue costs $4000 to rent. You've got $10 of every registration going straight to pay for the venue. Figure USAC takes a couple bucks to support/nourish the kids in Colorado Springs. Presumably they have to pay to rent the metal fencing, trusses, and other props. AND, since it's a UCI race, they have to meet minimum payouts for the pro classes and pay some UCI admin fees, etc...(somebody has to pay the pros) Figure another $4000-$5000 for that. Again, assuming ~400 racers they are already at $25-30/rider just to cover the overhead. If registration numbers slide the numbers start looking very red very quickly. No idea what kind of sponsorship money these events are bringing in but I'd guess it's mostly in-kind and not hard dollars.
I'm not saying $40-45 is cheap...and seems like a total ripoff for the beginner fields who only race for 30 minutes...but when you compare the cost of the actual entry to all of the other costs involved a) bike/tires/derailleur hangers, b) gas money, c) lodging, d) food, the $40 spent for the actual race looks pretty insignificant.
We have been talking recently about how to bring the cross back to the people....i.e. show up, drop an Andrew Jackson on the table and go race bikes. The sad reality is that they overhead costs, a large portion of which are imposed by The Man, make $20 races impossible to do unless you go rogue.
Norm and I have fretted over the cost thing a lot in the past couple years. Venues are getting harder and harder to secure as cross begins to eat it's own tail. Turns out that a lot of parks don't like the idea of having a bunch of skinny dorks tearing up their grass (despite the fact that it always comes back like new by springtime). As such you have to take what you can get, which often means paying a lot for venue rental.
To add to Norm's maths: Baystate has averaged right around 400 racers over the past few years (200 a day). Assume venue costs $4000 to rent. You've got $10 of every registration going straight to pay for the venue. Figure USAC takes a couple bucks to support/nourish the kids in Colorado Springs. Presumably they have to pay to rent the metal fencing, trusses, and other props. AND, since it's a UCI race, they have to meet minimum payouts for the pro classes and pay some UCI admin fees, etc...(somebody has to pay the pros) Figure another $4000-$5000 for that. Again, assuming ~400 racers they are already at $25-30/rider just to cover the overhead. If registration numbers slide the numbers start looking very red very quickly. No idea what kind of sponsorship money these events are bringing in but I'd guess it's mostly in-kind and not hard dollars.
I'm not saying $40-45 is cheap...and seems like a total ripoff for the beginner fields who only race for 30 minutes...but when you compare the cost of the actual entry to all of the other costs involved a) bike/tires/derailleur hangers, b) gas money, c) lodging, d) food, the $40 spent for the actual race looks pretty insignificant.
We have been talking recently about how to bring the cross back to the people....i.e. show up, drop an Andrew Jackson on the table and go race bikes. The sad reality is that they overhead costs, a large portion of which are imposed by The Man, make $20 races impossible to do unless you go rogue.
You can still see where the USGP was at Mercer the first year it was there.