Not legal but I think it is decriminalized. Yes, shouldn't have gotten a Mtb but not having a car makes getting to the good spots difficult.
@rick81721 for sure better than South Carolina or wherever you plan to move...
Moon Shadows are Evil
- Thread starter stb222
- Start date
@rick81721 for sure better than South Carolina or wherever you plan to move...
rick81721
Lothar
Yeah cali is a nice place - we actually considered Hawaii for awhile - that would have been awesome biking but finally concluded both places are too far away. Doomed to remain east coasters
Chillin on the PCH
From where my hotel is, the foothills are a little too much suburbia to get through so I head for the coast again. There aren’t that many ways to get there so I pretty much did the loop from Wednesday in the opposite direction. I also add a bike path to cut out some of the lights. There is no traffic at 5am, so I end up stopping quite as much.
While climbing the first longer hill, I am greeted by a coyote that is running in one lane over from me for maybe 50 yards. I am not sure if he was sizing me up or what but if he attacks, I will just turn around and bomb back down the hill. I stop to take a pre sunrise picture of the same ridge as the day before:
While taking this picture a guy walks past me and shields his eyes from my light. I say “Sorry and Good Morning” and no response. I understand this guy probably makes my yearly salary in a month, but you don’t have to be a dick. Anyways, I bomb the hill down to PCH. I still don’t feel comfortable on this bike whilst descending…
PCH, yeah, been there done that. It is chilly this morning and I am wearing arm and knee warmers and at the coast it is a tad warmer. There is one spot where the wind whips down the canyon and out to sea and for a half mile it is like being in a different world. I had noticed this yesterday too. Back in Laguna I don’t think I have time to climb the sister climb to the steep one yesterday, so I skip it and take a picture of my fred sled on the beach
And the view kinda doesn’t suck here
Heading back to the climb where I saw the zombie raccoon ladder, I notice how different the road seems in this direction, simply from a scenery perspective. I start to climb away from the coast and two peeps on road bikes pass me going downhill. Maybe a mile up the climb I look back and one of them is gaining on my pretty good. Up until this point I have pretty much been just riding around and not hammering in really any respect other than when the hills dictated. This guy gives me a little motivation to turn it up a bit and I don’t look back but I know he doesn’t pass me and in return I nab the 1,636 spot on the leaderboard #WINNING.
Back to another paved bike trail, which I took a picture of for the planning nerds at my office and now all downhill back to the hotel. This section of the route is nice and has limited lights. I see a bunch of roadies and a group ride of about 15-20 people and the end of my ride is uneventful.
Chillin on the PCH
I had to return my rental bike tonight, since it just wouldn’t work out to get it back on Friday, so I had planned to ride it to the office and ride after work to the rental shop. This would have allowed me to climb some of the foothills again, however I decided against it because there was a few things to coordinate that made it annoying and I would have to rely on my co-worker to bring my bag back to the hotel and I didn’t think he could manage to not fuck that up, so I ditched it. Instead I did a short ride from the hotel to do the return.
I had specifically selected some bike paths to check them out and I was basically going through the heart of Irvine. Irvine is a 100% planned community and is owned by a corporation that was apparently started by a single, rich family. In any case, everything is EXACTLY the same. As I mention, at first, this seems great, nice roads, clean, kids playing outside, people out exercising, chilling in the parks, etc. But after I started paying attention, man, there is nothing different. Nothing. The realest thing here is the fake boobs. It wouldn’t surprise me if the people that live here were selected to do so.
I ride through a development with a lake and a paved trail beside it. The people I pass look like robots and I start to feel uncomfortable. By the time I am 5-6 mile in, I start to dislike this place. It is too perfect, too sanitized. This sorta ruins the rest of my ride. I just want it to be done. I ride on another bike path through a utility easement with high tension powerlines, next to an LA style river, i.e. a drainage ditch. The bike facilities are insane but, man, it is ruined by the fakeness of this place. I am actually relieved when I stop riding but am disappointed I won’t be riding on my last day here.
This trip was nice, nice to ride in warm weather and I simply feel lucky I could make riding on this trip happen. This training brings me to Dallas, Alexandria and Pittsburgh. I am stoked on the burgh (Pittsburgh Dirty Dozen here I come), sorta for Alexandria, but meh to Dallas, F that concrete jungle oil town but I will probably ride there too…..
Please Get Me Out of This Stepford Sanitized Town
Took off two days, got in at 1:00am and didn't need to push for a ride Saturday. It is good to be home and the cold air felt good but at the same time has me wishing for the temps I left in Cali. I don't get hung up on stuff like that though because there ain't jack you can do about it in the short term....
There’s No Place like Home
From where my hotel is, the foothills are a little too much suburbia to get through so I head for the coast again. There aren’t that many ways to get there so I pretty much did the loop from Wednesday in the opposite direction. I also add a bike path to cut out some of the lights. There is no traffic at 5am, so I end up stopping quite as much.
While climbing the first longer hill, I am greeted by a coyote that is running in one lane over from me for maybe 50 yards. I am not sure if he was sizing me up or what but if he attacks, I will just turn around and bomb back down the hill. I stop to take a pre sunrise picture of the same ridge as the day before:
While taking this picture a guy walks past me and shields his eyes from my light. I say “Sorry and Good Morning” and no response. I understand this guy probably makes my yearly salary in a month, but you don’t have to be a dick. Anyways, I bomb the hill down to PCH. I still don’t feel comfortable on this bike whilst descending…
PCH, yeah, been there done that. It is chilly this morning and I am wearing arm and knee warmers and at the coast it is a tad warmer. There is one spot where the wind whips down the canyon and out to sea and for a half mile it is like being in a different world. I had noticed this yesterday too. Back in Laguna I don’t think I have time to climb the sister climb to the steep one yesterday, so I skip it and take a picture of my fred sled on the beach
And the view kinda doesn’t suck here
Heading back to the climb where I saw the zombie raccoon ladder, I notice how different the road seems in this direction, simply from a scenery perspective. I start to climb away from the coast and two peeps on road bikes pass me going downhill. Maybe a mile up the climb I look back and one of them is gaining on my pretty good. Up until this point I have pretty much been just riding around and not hammering in really any respect other than when the hills dictated. This guy gives me a little motivation to turn it up a bit and I don’t look back but I know he doesn’t pass me and in return I nab the 1,636 spot on the leaderboard #WINNING.
Back to another paved bike trail, which I took a picture of for the planning nerds at my office and now all downhill back to the hotel. This section of the route is nice and has limited lights. I see a bunch of roadies and a group ride of about 15-20 people and the end of my ride is uneventful.
Chillin on the PCH
I had to return my rental bike tonight, since it just wouldn’t work out to get it back on Friday, so I had planned to ride it to the office and ride after work to the rental shop. This would have allowed me to climb some of the foothills again, however I decided against it because there was a few things to coordinate that made it annoying and I would have to rely on my co-worker to bring my bag back to the hotel and I didn’t think he could manage to not fuck that up, so I ditched it. Instead I did a short ride from the hotel to do the return.
I had specifically selected some bike paths to check them out and I was basically going through the heart of Irvine. Irvine is a 100% planned community and is owned by a corporation that was apparently started by a single, rich family. In any case, everything is EXACTLY the same. As I mention, at first, this seems great, nice roads, clean, kids playing outside, people out exercising, chilling in the parks, etc. But after I started paying attention, man, there is nothing different. Nothing. The realest thing here is the fake boobs. It wouldn’t surprise me if the people that live here were selected to do so.
I ride through a development with a lake and a paved trail beside it. The people I pass look like robots and I start to feel uncomfortable. By the time I am 5-6 mile in, I start to dislike this place. It is too perfect, too sanitized. This sorta ruins the rest of my ride. I just want it to be done. I ride on another bike path through a utility easement with high tension powerlines, next to an LA style river, i.e. a drainage ditch. The bike facilities are insane but, man, it is ruined by the fakeness of this place. I am actually relieved when I stop riding but am disappointed I won’t be riding on my last day here.
This trip was nice, nice to ride in warm weather and I simply feel lucky I could make riding on this trip happen. This training brings me to Dallas, Alexandria and Pittsburgh. I am stoked on the burgh (Pittsburgh Dirty Dozen here I come), sorta for Alexandria, but meh to Dallas, F that concrete jungle oil town but I will probably ride there too…..
Please Get Me Out of This Stepford Sanitized Town
Took off two days, got in at 1:00am and didn't need to push for a ride Saturday. It is good to be home and the cold air felt good but at the same time has me wishing for the temps I left in Cali. I don't get hung up on stuff like that though because there ain't jack you can do about it in the short term....
There’s No Place like Home
03/15
Lone Texas Tuesday
My training this month brought me to the Dallas, TX area and I had a second helping of meh when I found out I had to come back to this city after a conference a few years back. I would have much rather gone to Austin but you deal with the hand that has been dealt.
After my Cali trip I researched bike rental places and quickly found multiple options, which surprised me. Uber makes picking these bikes up incredibly easy btw and is how I got to and from my rentals in Cali and here. After checking into my hotel, I had to make a bee line for the bike store before they closed and got there with 10 min to spare. Super cool dudes and got me set up lickety split. Selecting a route out here was hard because there are a ton of options to get to the same point, which was a stark contrast to California. I picked a loop around a big motherf’er of a lake. Pretty quickly got out of the suburban death sprawl and was surprised to be on country type roads and rolling hills. Ok, maybe not hills per say but not flat either. I see roughly 100 Texas flags in a half hour so figured I had to take a pic:
There roads were nice and getting murdered by the wind was on the back of my mind. Eventually I have the wind to my back and head closer to this lake. The loop takes me into a park and I am on an access road that loops to the lake. I see trails winding in and out that remind me of Mercer or Six Mile. And then I come to this:
Uuumm, see a detour sign through a trailead and take it, sandy, rooty, twisty, but all good. Come out of detour, back on road, completely flooded again. Ooooook, back into the woods and eventually come out in an apartment complex. I get a strange look from someone outside an apartment as my spandex ass climbs over a barrier. I give a quick peep to google maps and get back on track. So now it is tailwind flying through rolling terrain and my garmin route tries to take me down a frontage road the wrong way, but luckily there was one on the other side of the highway also, where I took this:
Eventually the road turned into a ramp to the highway and since I didn’t want I ride on the highway, I had to salmon the other side for more than a mile. Meh, but hardly any traffic so whateves. By this point and I am entering suburban concrete death. In this death circle around dallas, bicycle and pedestrian considerations are not existent. They have huge right of ways for the roads, 4-6 lanes, however the lane at the edge of the road goes directly to the curb. So if a standard lane is 10-12’, they squeeze 3, 10’ lanes in and the right hand 10’ lane has a curb. No defined gutter or buffer, at all. So you guys know I don’t mind taking the lane and given these conditions, I am 18”-2’ from the curb. I really don’t care about traffic because there is plenty of room for them to get around in the other two lanes. I have one or two buzzes but no other issues.
By now it is dark and I am dumped out at DFW airport (which is GD gigantic) on a road which is effectively a highway with no cars at all. Huge shoulder, smooth concrete and a tailwind, ahhhh, mid-high 20’s cruising. Eventually this road comes to a point where it looks like it is going onto the actually highway and garmin apparently has me on a road that isn’t actually there. Find my way to not get on to the highway and garmin puts me on another road that isn’t there. WTF. Ok, get me back to the hotel, which I see in the distance and it never seems to get closer. But eventually it does, as always, and my ride is over….
Texas is the Reason
Waco Wednesday
I wanted to ride to Waco but I didn’t, remember the shit that went down there?
My route on this day took me towards Plano, which was unknowingly pure suburban fucking death. Death in the sense that my brain died from the boredom of every road simply being the same. Almost immediately the garmin route creator has me being a bike salmon again on some kind of frontage road. It is early, so I don’t mind but at one point I do hop onto the grass because there was no safe place for me to be. Other than that, more of the same crap, 2-3 lanes in each direction and zero shoulder. I do find one road that has a bike lane, but it doesn’t help. My mouth is stained from the taste of concrete and I am wasting time sitting at damn lights. One bit of fun was lane splitting and blowing lights, which I am sure the locals are not accustom to. I also see some sick ditches that would be some fun riding but I don’t bother stopping to take a picture. All I have to report on this ride is don’t go towards Plano.
Concrete Suburban Death Sprawl
However, my training ends a tad early and not meeting work peeps until later, so ride time! I had a route planned to downtown Dallas and I head in that direction. Rush time, no shoulder, meh, head down and hammering is my only solace. I had read about this flagship bike/ped project in Dallas call the Trinity River Trail and it looked cool so I wanted to check it. Found a super legit bike lane right before with even physical lane delineation, nice!
And this huge ramp down to the River Trail. Signs says flooding, whateves, go around gate. There is NO ONE down here and it turns out this thing is built IN THE RIVER BASIN. I named this the rape alley or maybe river in the valley of rape, almost immediately as there is no way out. I am glad I am exploring this when it is light as opposed to in the morning when I had planned to ride it. There is a river on one side, 50’ embakement on the other, which you can get over only to be met by a fence and industrial buildings, lovely. It was kinda amusing as when I looked on google map’s after the ride, the entire basin was flooded. Some of it was flooded today but I made my way around. There is a trail here some where:
It is at least two miles between access points to this thing and I want out. What a horrible design. Some fun was had blasting through dried mud on the concrete but that’s was about it. At least I was able to look at this cool bridge the whole way…
I exit through the most uninviting entrance to the trail and am smack in downtown, which actually has bike lanes and good ones too. Dallas has a good skate scene and I peep some buttery ledges:
Soon I find Katy’s trails, which I gather isan old railroad bed and it is like an oasis, tons of people on a 10-12’ wide path with areas that had a separate path for people walking. It was impressive to say the least and in 3-4 miles I passed at least 200 people. What a stark contrast as everywhere else I had been where I saw a single person on a bike in 70 miles. I assumed it was all the pretty people in Dallas and 80% was probably women and the men looked like the type @rick81721 likes.
It dumps me at a university and for a while the roads are good, the houses are nice to look at and I am feeling good and I even have a tailwind. It is warm and it feels nice. I murder the concrete death roads on the way back to the hotel and arrive just around dusk.
Avoided Getting Mugged on the Trinity River Death Trail, Found a Nice Bike Path and Found Nice City Roads, I'd Say that a Win
Thunder Thursday
Thunderstorms in the morning kept me inside as TX storms aren’t something to mess with considering the day before there was 2” hail not far from where I was. I had a route planned to return my bike and honestly, didn’t have very high hopes for it. I diverted from it almost immediately to peep more of the river trail, which some of it was closed due to flooding, which I naturally went round the signs as I didn’t see any imminent danger:
And there wasn’t any minus this:
I also took this picture around this area to show TX’s love affair with concrete:
Eventually I hit the road again with the standard non-shoulder conditions. I pass the shop for return the bike and realize I have more time, so I head towards the area with the better roads. I just start to get to them and have to turn around. The ride was mostly uneventful and I return the bike to the shop. The guy at the shop says he can’t sell any fat bikes after I ask if they are big ‘round these parts.
So all-in-all my rides were ok even those the burbs of Dallas are some of the most inhospitable roads for anything that isn’t a car. But at least I saw it with my own eyes rather than just seeing the inside of a hotel room or bar like the rest of the people in my training. Farewell state of concrete, I hope to not see you again unless it is in Austin…
Farewell Land 'o Concrete
Lone Texas Tuesday
My training this month brought me to the Dallas, TX area and I had a second helping of meh when I found out I had to come back to this city after a conference a few years back. I would have much rather gone to Austin but you deal with the hand that has been dealt.
After my Cali trip I researched bike rental places and quickly found multiple options, which surprised me. Uber makes picking these bikes up incredibly easy btw and is how I got to and from my rentals in Cali and here. After checking into my hotel, I had to make a bee line for the bike store before they closed and got there with 10 min to spare. Super cool dudes and got me set up lickety split. Selecting a route out here was hard because there are a ton of options to get to the same point, which was a stark contrast to California. I picked a loop around a big motherf’er of a lake. Pretty quickly got out of the suburban death sprawl and was surprised to be on country type roads and rolling hills. Ok, maybe not hills per say but not flat either. I see roughly 100 Texas flags in a half hour so figured I had to take a pic:
There roads were nice and getting murdered by the wind was on the back of my mind. Eventually I have the wind to my back and head closer to this lake. The loop takes me into a park and I am on an access road that loops to the lake. I see trails winding in and out that remind me of Mercer or Six Mile. And then I come to this:
Uuumm, see a detour sign through a trailead and take it, sandy, rooty, twisty, but all good. Come out of detour, back on road, completely flooded again. Ooooook, back into the woods and eventually come out in an apartment complex. I get a strange look from someone outside an apartment as my spandex ass climbs over a barrier. I give a quick peep to google maps and get back on track. So now it is tailwind flying through rolling terrain and my garmin route tries to take me down a frontage road the wrong way, but luckily there was one on the other side of the highway also, where I took this:
Eventually the road turned into a ramp to the highway and since I didn’t want I ride on the highway, I had to salmon the other side for more than a mile. Meh, but hardly any traffic so whateves. By this point and I am entering suburban concrete death. In this death circle around dallas, bicycle and pedestrian considerations are not existent. They have huge right of ways for the roads, 4-6 lanes, however the lane at the edge of the road goes directly to the curb. So if a standard lane is 10-12’, they squeeze 3, 10’ lanes in and the right hand 10’ lane has a curb. No defined gutter or buffer, at all. So you guys know I don’t mind taking the lane and given these conditions, I am 18”-2’ from the curb. I really don’t care about traffic because there is plenty of room for them to get around in the other two lanes. I have one or two buzzes but no other issues.
By now it is dark and I am dumped out at DFW airport (which is GD gigantic) on a road which is effectively a highway with no cars at all. Huge shoulder, smooth concrete and a tailwind, ahhhh, mid-high 20’s cruising. Eventually this road comes to a point where it looks like it is going onto the actually highway and garmin apparently has me on a road that isn’t actually there. Find my way to not get on to the highway and garmin puts me on another road that isn’t there. WTF. Ok, get me back to the hotel, which I see in the distance and it never seems to get closer. But eventually it does, as always, and my ride is over….
Texas is the Reason
Waco Wednesday
I wanted to ride to Waco but I didn’t, remember the shit that went down there?
My route on this day took me towards Plano, which was unknowingly pure suburban fucking death. Death in the sense that my brain died from the boredom of every road simply being the same. Almost immediately the garmin route creator has me being a bike salmon again on some kind of frontage road. It is early, so I don’t mind but at one point I do hop onto the grass because there was no safe place for me to be. Other than that, more of the same crap, 2-3 lanes in each direction and zero shoulder. I do find one road that has a bike lane, but it doesn’t help. My mouth is stained from the taste of concrete and I am wasting time sitting at damn lights. One bit of fun was lane splitting and blowing lights, which I am sure the locals are not accustom to. I also see some sick ditches that would be some fun riding but I don’t bother stopping to take a picture. All I have to report on this ride is don’t go towards Plano.
Concrete Suburban Death Sprawl
However, my training ends a tad early and not meeting work peeps until later, so ride time! I had a route planned to downtown Dallas and I head in that direction. Rush time, no shoulder, meh, head down and hammering is my only solace. I had read about this flagship bike/ped project in Dallas call the Trinity River Trail and it looked cool so I wanted to check it. Found a super legit bike lane right before with even physical lane delineation, nice!
And this huge ramp down to the River Trail. Signs says flooding, whateves, go around gate. There is NO ONE down here and it turns out this thing is built IN THE RIVER BASIN. I named this the rape alley or maybe river in the valley of rape, almost immediately as there is no way out. I am glad I am exploring this when it is light as opposed to in the morning when I had planned to ride it. There is a river on one side, 50’ embakement on the other, which you can get over only to be met by a fence and industrial buildings, lovely. It was kinda amusing as when I looked on google map’s after the ride, the entire basin was flooded. Some of it was flooded today but I made my way around. There is a trail here some where:
It is at least two miles between access points to this thing and I want out. What a horrible design. Some fun was had blasting through dried mud on the concrete but that’s was about it. At least I was able to look at this cool bridge the whole way…
I exit through the most uninviting entrance to the trail and am smack in downtown, which actually has bike lanes and good ones too. Dallas has a good skate scene and I peep some buttery ledges:
Soon I find Katy’s trails, which I gather isan old railroad bed and it is like an oasis, tons of people on a 10-12’ wide path with areas that had a separate path for people walking. It was impressive to say the least and in 3-4 miles I passed at least 200 people. What a stark contrast as everywhere else I had been where I saw a single person on a bike in 70 miles. I assumed it was all the pretty people in Dallas and 80% was probably women and the men looked like the type @rick81721 likes.
It dumps me at a university and for a while the roads are good, the houses are nice to look at and I am feeling good and I even have a tailwind. It is warm and it feels nice. I murder the concrete death roads on the way back to the hotel and arrive just around dusk.
Avoided Getting Mugged on the Trinity River Death Trail, Found a Nice Bike Path and Found Nice City Roads, I'd Say that a Win
Thunder Thursday
Thunderstorms in the morning kept me inside as TX storms aren’t something to mess with considering the day before there was 2” hail not far from where I was. I had a route planned to return my bike and honestly, didn’t have very high hopes for it. I diverted from it almost immediately to peep more of the river trail, which some of it was closed due to flooding, which I naturally went round the signs as I didn’t see any imminent danger:
And there wasn’t any minus this:
I also took this picture around this area to show TX’s love affair with concrete:
Eventually I hit the road again with the standard non-shoulder conditions. I pass the shop for return the bike and realize I have more time, so I head towards the area with the better roads. I just start to get to them and have to turn around. The ride was mostly uneventful and I return the bike to the shop. The guy at the shop says he can’t sell any fat bikes after I ask if they are big ‘round these parts.
So all-in-all my rides were ok even those the burbs of Dallas are some of the most inhospitable roads for anything that isn’t a car. But at least I saw it with my own eyes rather than just seeing the inside of a hotel room or bar like the rest of the people in my training. Farewell state of concrete, I hope to not see you again unless it is in Austin…
Farewell Land 'o Concrete
HoH 2016: The Year of Perfect Everything
The Day is Nigh
Errrrbody knows that Hell of Hunterdon is a no-miss ride for me each year for a variety of reasons, one of them being that the southern half of this route are my home roads, so it is fun to ride an event that includes those. Also, given the dirt aspect, it gives us a place to shows these roadies wuusssup.
Leading up to the ride I have had one of my most consistent streaks of riding ever, one missing a handful of days starting in September and generally averaging 50 hours per month. BIYF this year kept me motivated and going into HOH I had around 140 hours and 2,400 miles. Also, @Mountain Bike Mike was doing some serious prep for HOH and was talking some smack via text about sticking it to me on the ride. I wasn’t really sure if he was going to try and attack me the whole way, so just in case a few weeks before I started to sharpen the point a bit. This happens around this time anyways but I needed to make sure I was out of slow rolling winter mode. Ofcourse I started eat milkshakes in the HOH cup a few days before the ride (ok, I eat that shit almost every night):
On the MBM topic, about two weeks before HOH we did a lunch ride where I rode my normal pace, which Mike matched but on one punchy hill, I fully opened up and ripped off Mikes legs and left them in a quivering bloody mess on the side of the road. Shortly after he was on a ball busting campaign about how I am a roadie and regardless of my history of bmx, trials and mtb, I am not that rider anymore, just a roadie. I told him meh to labels even though they are impossible to escape. So, sure, I ride mostly road and love it but I am not sure I completely fall into the roadie cast and I think Mike saw why at HOH.
The Day is Here
I have always ridden to and from HOH and planned to do the same. Started off the day making pancakes for me and my son and left enough for the twin chicks, who would be up after I headed out. I was taking my time and busted Mike’s balls about showing up to the ride very early and then I realized I was running later than I wanted, whoops. Head out at a normal-slow pace and go to Mountain View Road and enjoy some new pavement through the woods. This road opens up to an awesome view of the Sourland Ridge and as I come into the field, the sun is bright, the sky is clear and a plane is circling to land at the airport just over the trees to the right. I soak it in, what a great start to the day.
I arrive around 8:45, slam two cups of coffee, see @Mitch and @Chris26er and I go look for Mike and the typical MTBNJ peeps who ride this almost every year. I find Mike after starring directly past him in the crowd because I didn’t recognize his kit. We find and @pooriggy , who is a HOH regular and this is the one time of year I know I will see him and @Chris26er. I meet a few other mtbnj peeps, including the now infamous @David "Fat Bike" Taylor. We are really close to heading out and I look for @ChrisG , which is another HOH regular and say hi to him and the rest of his crew, @Robin (wished her good luck!), @cem and @BiknBen , with just enough time to run back and jump in the second group to leave.
Like clockwork, within a few min on Hollow Road, some dude is brake checking, lifting his rear wheel and all. This is the first note in a long day of watching people and their poor bike handling skills. Find @pooriggy on the first little kicker and ride close enough to him to bump shoulders and it is like he doesn’t even notice. We chat it up for a min and Mike and I ride off. We have a NE wind, so the typically looking for some wheels to follow on Wertsviile Road isn’t necessary as we will have a tailwind. We come down Montgomery after riding in the best conditions I have ever seen the dirt section of that road and find @ArmyOfNone , which was a pleasant surprise and chit chat for a min and continue on our way.
I am just chillin and chatting with Mike up and over Rileyville Road, where I point out to Mike some of the people we pass on the climb that are rocking 40rpm cadence, mostly likely bottomed out in their gearing. I am curious to how those people do later in the ride pushin gears like that. After Syndertown, which catch a small group of 8-9 guys at the peak of the small rise on Linvale. Mike is ready to blow past but I tell him this group may be good to get a free ride when we hit Wertsville again, so we stay behind. During the next dirt section, I notice the group’s kit is from Deptford, NJ and am fairly certain I have chosen the right group since flatlanders can motor on the flats. Turns out I was right as when we hit Wertsville, they are pulling a solid pace and I am sitting pretty in 2nd or 3rd wheel. I keep peeping back to see if Mike is there and I think he is. We pick up more in Ringoes due to the light at 202 and on Boss Rd these dudes are pulling in the high 20’s. I figure Mike is struggling so I swing out at the next stop sign to make sure he is there, which is (just barely), and I hop back in. I lead through the next dirt section and once we hit pavement, the same two guys are on the front again and I am chilling. Turns out Mike was doing anything but chilling, so I let them go and wait at the next stop sign. We chill as we know Pine Hill is coming up, which is the steepest paved part of the route and while climbing that it is the first time I feel any discomfort for the day. I bomb the other side and am cock blocked by some retards that can’t corner but I still bridge up to the Deptford flatlanders and I ride their wheels up the next small uphill drag and pull off to wait for Mike.
A few min later Mike rolls up and is taking a feed and actually stops to eat. WTF bro, you don’t need to stop and eat!
During the next section some guy squeaks by Mike with very little room and way closer than needed and we end up riding with his small group for awhile. I take some pulls, they take some and we bomb down to the bridge on Strimples Mill and to the rest stop. I chat with @seanrunnette about the suppository size cliff bars they had, slam some cookies and fig newtons, top of the bottles and are off.
The Stompf Tavern downhill is always a leg burner but super fun. Somewhere around this time Mike starts to complain about his vagina, or hip flexors, I am not sure which and how the headwind is going to hurt. The wind is maybe 5 mph, so I am not concerned and after Federal Twist, I suggest he ride my wheel as there is no use him sitting in the wind if he is starting to hurt. On 29 we catch some dude that tells Mike his dingle berry seat bag is falling off and we stop to fit it. The next few miles are relatively uneventful and we are only passing people here and there and a random person or two will come pass us. On 179, I see a group up the road and tell Mike that may be a good group to hang with after the next rest stop.
Lakeview Road is in stupid good condition and we catch said group at the rest stop and head out just after them. We catch them quickly on Hunter Road, just before the dirt turns to large gravel. We start to descend and the guys are bunching up, then I see one has the stanky leg out and his bike is at some odd angle. He doesn’t go down but causes a jam up behind, which annoys me. What was Mike saying about calling me a roadie? The dirt sections are where we speed up, not stanky leg it and slow down. Unfortunately this group is blocking the road and can’t descend worth a dick and I know at that point we will not be riding with this group. I manage my way around and we leave them on Pleasant Valley and find the dude we found on NJ 29, again.
Barry Road is next and I take it easy and turn the juice on in the field portion to see if Mike responds. Turns out he doesn’t and I look back at the dirt s-turn and I don’t even see him, WTF? I continue on and stop on 518 and he eventually comes. I know Mike is toast when he doesn’t hold me wheel on the Wilson Road dirt downhill as normally downhill is where he excels. He complains more about his vag and says I can ride on, but that is useless at this point.
More of the same for the rest of the ride, pass a few, one may pass us. At the bottom of Aunt Molly, I think Mike is coming pass me after the dirt section and I say “I love going down on Dirty Aunt Molly” and it turns out it isn’t Mike but the son of the family that hosts the first rest stop. We chat for a bit, Mike catches back up, along with NJ 29 dudeman and on the next kicker I am alone again. Wait on Province Line, Mike falls off at the top, slow up again and just chill on Spring Hill. Some dude comes flying past and yells to another guy we just passed to hop on. The guy puts on like a full sprint to catch this guy’s wheel right before the little rise before the steep part of the descent. They are maybe 10 bike lengths ahead and I open up and pass them to make sure they don’t cock block me on the downhill, which is one of the fastest downhills in the Sourlands and a personal favorite of mine due to the death corner at the bottom. I bomb the f out of the turn and rip the bottom. It turns out Mike got stuck behind them on the hill and I wait on 518. Mike is just up to me and a small group blows by and I catch their wheel but Mike doesn’t. Two of the guys fall off, I am on the front and a dude on a sick Moots trade off until the end. I feel like I could go another few hours and felt really good at the end.
Chill with Mike, 26er, Iggy and Elite Ken for a while and eat some food I really don’t feel like eating. I head out to ride home and still feel good. I ride up Aunt Molly and see @Mitch coming down just before I stop to take this picture.
And another one closer to home to so how spectacular the sky was on this day
I arrive home and my son and the two neighbors greet me by running beside me like those kids do when bikepackers visit remote towns in 3rd world countries. I stop and am sitting on my saddle and my son goes EWWWW and points to the nose of my ssddle sticking out about 3” between my legs and he told me he thought it was my penis. That was the perfect end to my ride as it shows I am teaching the kid the right stuff.
Later in the evening my wife points out something on my legs to which I look in horror at the dreaded knee warmer tan / burn line.
Luckily it it faded already so I don’t have to deal with that embarrassment throughout the warmer months.
All in all a great day and it always feels good to have a lot in the tank at the end of 6 hours of saddle time. Another HOH in the books….
HOH 2016: The Year of Perfect Everything
The Day is Nigh
Errrrbody knows that Hell of Hunterdon is a no-miss ride for me each year for a variety of reasons, one of them being that the southern half of this route are my home roads, so it is fun to ride an event that includes those. Also, given the dirt aspect, it gives us a place to shows these roadies wuusssup.
Leading up to the ride I have had one of my most consistent streaks of riding ever, one missing a handful of days starting in September and generally averaging 50 hours per month. BIYF this year kept me motivated and going into HOH I had around 140 hours and 2,400 miles. Also, @Mountain Bike Mike was doing some serious prep for HOH and was talking some smack via text about sticking it to me on the ride. I wasn’t really sure if he was going to try and attack me the whole way, so just in case a few weeks before I started to sharpen the point a bit. This happens around this time anyways but I needed to make sure I was out of slow rolling winter mode. Ofcourse I started eat milkshakes in the HOH cup a few days before the ride (ok, I eat that shit almost every night):
On the MBM topic, about two weeks before HOH we did a lunch ride where I rode my normal pace, which Mike matched but on one punchy hill, I fully opened up and ripped off Mikes legs and left them in a quivering bloody mess on the side of the road. Shortly after he was on a ball busting campaign about how I am a roadie and regardless of my history of bmx, trials and mtb, I am not that rider anymore, just a roadie. I told him meh to labels even though they are impossible to escape. So, sure, I ride mostly road and love it but I am not sure I completely fall into the roadie cast and I think Mike saw why at HOH.
The Day is Here
I have always ridden to and from HOH and planned to do the same. Started off the day making pancakes for me and my son and left enough for the twin chicks, who would be up after I headed out. I was taking my time and busted Mike’s balls about showing up to the ride very early and then I realized I was running later than I wanted, whoops. Head out at a normal-slow pace and go to Mountain View Road and enjoy some new pavement through the woods. This road opens up to an awesome view of the Sourland Ridge and as I come into the field, the sun is bright, the sky is clear and a plane is circling to land at the airport just over the trees to the right. I soak it in, what a great start to the day.
I arrive around 8:45, slam two cups of coffee, see @Mitch and @Chris26er and I go look for Mike and the typical MTBNJ peeps who ride this almost every year. I find Mike after starring directly past him in the crowd because I didn’t recognize his kit. We find and @pooriggy , who is a HOH regular and this is the one time of year I know I will see him and @Chris26er. I meet a few other mtbnj peeps, including the now infamous @David "Fat Bike" Taylor. We are really close to heading out and I look for @ChrisG , which is another HOH regular and say hi to him and the rest of his crew, @Robin (wished her good luck!), @cem and @BiknBen , with just enough time to run back and jump in the second group to leave.
Like clockwork, within a few min on Hollow Road, some dude is brake checking, lifting his rear wheel and all. This is the first note in a long day of watching people and their poor bike handling skills. Find @pooriggy on the first little kicker and ride close enough to him to bump shoulders and it is like he doesn’t even notice. We chat it up for a min and Mike and I ride off. We have a NE wind, so the typically looking for some wheels to follow on Wertsviile Road isn’t necessary as we will have a tailwind. We come down Montgomery after riding in the best conditions I have ever seen the dirt section of that road and find @ArmyOfNone , which was a pleasant surprise and chit chat for a min and continue on our way.
I am just chillin and chatting with Mike up and over Rileyville Road, where I point out to Mike some of the people we pass on the climb that are rocking 40rpm cadence, mostly likely bottomed out in their gearing. I am curious to how those people do later in the ride pushin gears like that. After Syndertown, which catch a small group of 8-9 guys at the peak of the small rise on Linvale. Mike is ready to blow past but I tell him this group may be good to get a free ride when we hit Wertsville again, so we stay behind. During the next dirt section, I notice the group’s kit is from Deptford, NJ and am fairly certain I have chosen the right group since flatlanders can motor on the flats. Turns out I was right as when we hit Wertsville, they are pulling a solid pace and I am sitting pretty in 2nd or 3rd wheel. I keep peeping back to see if Mike is there and I think he is. We pick up more in Ringoes due to the light at 202 and on Boss Rd these dudes are pulling in the high 20’s. I figure Mike is struggling so I swing out at the next stop sign to make sure he is there, which is (just barely), and I hop back in. I lead through the next dirt section and once we hit pavement, the same two guys are on the front again and I am chilling. Turns out Mike was doing anything but chilling, so I let them go and wait at the next stop sign. We chill as we know Pine Hill is coming up, which is the steepest paved part of the route and while climbing that it is the first time I feel any discomfort for the day. I bomb the other side and am cock blocked by some retards that can’t corner but I still bridge up to the Deptford flatlanders and I ride their wheels up the next small uphill drag and pull off to wait for Mike.
A few min later Mike rolls up and is taking a feed and actually stops to eat. WTF bro, you don’t need to stop and eat!
During the next section some guy squeaks by Mike with very little room and way closer than needed and we end up riding with his small group for awhile. I take some pulls, they take some and we bomb down to the bridge on Strimples Mill and to the rest stop. I chat with @seanrunnette about the suppository size cliff bars they had, slam some cookies and fig newtons, top of the bottles and are off.
The Stompf Tavern downhill is always a leg burner but super fun. Somewhere around this time Mike starts to complain about his vagina, or hip flexors, I am not sure which and how the headwind is going to hurt. The wind is maybe 5 mph, so I am not concerned and after Federal Twist, I suggest he ride my wheel as there is no use him sitting in the wind if he is starting to hurt. On 29 we catch some dude that tells Mike his dingle berry seat bag is falling off and we stop to fit it. The next few miles are relatively uneventful and we are only passing people here and there and a random person or two will come pass us. On 179, I see a group up the road and tell Mike that may be a good group to hang with after the next rest stop.
Lakeview Road is in stupid good condition and we catch said group at the rest stop and head out just after them. We catch them quickly on Hunter Road, just before the dirt turns to large gravel. We start to descend and the guys are bunching up, then I see one has the stanky leg out and his bike is at some odd angle. He doesn’t go down but causes a jam up behind, which annoys me. What was Mike saying about calling me a roadie? The dirt sections are where we speed up, not stanky leg it and slow down. Unfortunately this group is blocking the road and can’t descend worth a dick and I know at that point we will not be riding with this group. I manage my way around and we leave them on Pleasant Valley and find the dude we found on NJ 29, again.
Barry Road is next and I take it easy and turn the juice on in the field portion to see if Mike responds. Turns out he doesn’t and I look back at the dirt s-turn and I don’t even see him, WTF? I continue on and stop on 518 and he eventually comes. I know Mike is toast when he doesn’t hold me wheel on the Wilson Road dirt downhill as normally downhill is where he excels. He complains more about his vag and says I can ride on, but that is useless at this point.
More of the same for the rest of the ride, pass a few, one may pass us. At the bottom of Aunt Molly, I think Mike is coming pass me after the dirt section and I say “I love going down on Dirty Aunt Molly” and it turns out it isn’t Mike but the son of the family that hosts the first rest stop. We chat for a bit, Mike catches back up, along with NJ 29 dudeman and on the next kicker I am alone again. Wait on Province Line, Mike falls off at the top, slow up again and just chill on Spring Hill. Some dude comes flying past and yells to another guy we just passed to hop on. The guy puts on like a full sprint to catch this guy’s wheel right before the little rise before the steep part of the descent. They are maybe 10 bike lengths ahead and I open up and pass them to make sure they don’t cock block me on the downhill, which is one of the fastest downhills in the Sourlands and a personal favorite of mine due to the death corner at the bottom. I bomb the f out of the turn and rip the bottom. It turns out Mike got stuck behind them on the hill and I wait on 518. Mike is just up to me and a small group blows by and I catch their wheel but Mike doesn’t. Two of the guys fall off, I am on the front and a dude on a sick Moots trade off until the end. I feel like I could go another few hours and felt really good at the end.
Chill with Mike, 26er, Iggy and Elite Ken for a while and eat some food I really don’t feel like eating. I head out to ride home and still feel good. I ride up Aunt Molly and see @Mitch coming down just before I stop to take this picture.
And another one closer to home to so how spectacular the sky was on this day
I arrive home and my son and the two neighbors greet me by running beside me like those kids do when bikepackers visit remote towns in 3rd world countries. I stop and am sitting on my saddle and my son goes EWWWW and points to the nose of my ssddle sticking out about 3” between my legs and he told me he thought it was my penis. That was the perfect end to my ride as it shows I am teaching the kid the right stuff.
Later in the evening my wife points out something on my legs to which I look in horror at the dreaded knee warmer tan / burn line.
Luckily it it faded already so I don’t have to deal with that embarrassment throughout the warmer months.
All in all a great day and it always feels good to have a lot in the tank at the end of 6 hours of saddle time. Another HOH in the books….
HOH 2016: The Year of Perfect Everything
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Now this was what I was looking for for. @Mountain Bike Mike should start drinking more kale protein shakes or something.
Nicely done....in for the mbm smack talking
out of curiosity..this guy? Danny?
Mountain Bike Mike
Well-Known Member
In person, Kev is cool and a decent person to hang with almost as cool as Germy. They seem to be carved from the same tree.
Stating the obvious - In this forum and via txt - hiding behind the keyboard, he's a complete DOUCHEBAG. What? Just calling it like I see it - which is his usual justification for his online dickery. If I didn't know better, I'd take it personal and probably kick you in the teeth the next time I saw you but I know it's just you maintaining your "street cred"
You're recap is spot on especially the emphasis on my shortcomings. We get it - You're faster than me on the road. Congratulations. No surprise there since, as you stated, rode alone for a rediculous amount of time - kind of sad. Other than me, who else have you ridden with? Haha - who has the vagina? Seems you're wife won't let you out other than two events a year. You only ride before they're awake or at lunch.
You claim to just ride and disregard the "roadie" label but you got that roadie prick swager mastered. And 98% of your riding is on the road bike.
Nicely done Street Cred Kev - you've supported the label 100%.
Stating the obvious - In this forum and via txt - hiding behind the keyboard, he's a complete DOUCHEBAG. What? Just calling it like I see it - which is his usual justification for his online dickery. If I didn't know better, I'd take it personal and probably kick you in the teeth the next time I saw you but I know it's just you maintaining your "street cred"
You're recap is spot on especially the emphasis on my shortcomings. We get it - You're faster than me on the road. Congratulations. No surprise there since, as you stated, rode alone for a rediculous amount of time - kind of sad. Other than me, who else have you ridden with? Haha - who has the vagina? Seems you're wife won't let you out other than two events a year. You only ride before they're awake or at lunch.
You claim to just ride and disregard the "roadie" label but you got that roadie prick swager mastered. And 98% of your riding is on the road bike.
Nicely done Street Cred Kev - you've supported the label 100%.
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Pearl
THIS CHANGES EVERYTHING
Why dont you two settle this like men...on the golf...errrr mountain bike course.
I like this one...MBM has that position of being the underdog...even he loses, whatever...But jesus...what if he wins? Someone might have to quit the sport...And this is not directed specifically @stb222....thats a good spot to be in mbm...remember that when you are in a race an need some motivation.
I like this one...MBM has that position of being the underdog...even he loses, whatever...But jesus...what if he wins? Someone might have to quit the sport...And this is not directed specifically @stb222....thats a good spot to be in mbm...remember that when you are in a race an need some motivation.
rick81721
Lothar
Very well may be, was a Moots with disc brakes but over the course of the mile we rode near each other, I didn't take much else in.Nicely done....in for the mbm smack talking
out of curiosity..this guy? Danny?
I make fun of Rick enough so if I do it much more, I will really be a dick. Tongue and cheek is spot on.
I called it that next year is when the tide will turn on the road side. He already whoops up on me on the mtb, which is where he wants to be fast and where he trains for, so not sure why he gots his panties in a bunch.
Mountain Bike Mike
Well-Known Member
rick81721
Lothar
Mike some words of wisdom 😀:
Give up, just quit, because in this life, you can’t win. Yeah, you can try, but in the end you’re just gonna lose, big time, because the world is run by the Man. The Man, oh, you don’t know the Man? He’s everywhere. In the White House… at work… @Norm, he’s the Man. And the Man ruined the ozone, he’s burning down the Amazon, and he kidnapped Shamu and put her in a chlorine tank! And there used to be a way to stick it to the Man. It was called rock ‘n roll, but guess what, oh no, the Man ruined that, too, with a little thing called MTV! So don’t waste your time trying to make anything cool or pure or awesome ’cause the Man is just gonna call you a fat washed up loser and crush your soul. So do yourselves a favor and just GIVE UP!