i ended up going with a 2011 ram. a friend of a friend is a sales guy at a new honda dealer and they had a 2011 laramie come in with only 44k on it. crew cab, 2wd, 5' bed. he gave it to me for considerably less than bluebook, and i didnt have to fight and haggle. has all sorts of nice features and is way more truck than i need. averaged 20mpg on the 35mile drive home last night.
after thorough research a mid sized pickup would be good for a year or two, but as my family grows i'm going to need the space. also i found out my company expenses mileage in addition to the car allowance so i wasn't as worried about the mpg.