The STRUGGLE bus...let's get some positivity going.

Dave Taylor

Dave Taylor

Rex kwan Do
Some of you know, some of you don't. I had a pretty bad head injury in September. Initially I didn't think it was that bad but after this long winter the positives are BARELY outweighing the negatives. Long story short, I fainted at home and hit my head full force on a hardwood floor and got knocked out for around 5 minutes. Hospital trip, broken orbital floor and a concussion. I think this one is hitting me hard because I have had several concussions in the past, one very severe in 2001.

I will list the positives as there are many, but some pretty heavy negatives that weigh in here.

Positives: I have a great family. I have a great job. I am doing very well financially. I am typically a positive person. Tuesday TMB starts this week.
Negatives: General fatigue since accident. Tough to do what I love(cycling). Have all the gym and exercise equipment I need but can't motivate more than 1-2 hours per week. Difficult to take my mind off negatives. I have been more of a gaslighter on social media despite not really having a solid opinion on politics.

I'll finish with, I'm just feeling off and would like some thoughts/suggestions. I still drink but no more than 1-2 beers 3-4 times a week. I've gone to an AA meeting or two recently and found some positives. I don't feel I drink too much but I feel I can't stop cravings if I want an off day. I'm reading some books thanks to friends (Quit drinking without willpower). I'm sure my job in NJ is stressful but at the same time my boss has given me a great assurance of job security when not many have that. Thanks for reading.
 
I'm sorry your recovery is taking so long. Life is funny sometimes. For me I could not just drink less. I would cut back and eventually be back to drinking almost every night. I didn't get drunk every day, but needed a drink to deal with life. For me quitting completely and AA was the only way. I tried a few other ways first.

Good luck and feel better. Make sure you talk to your friends and family. Don't isolate your self.
 
I would turn my back on politics and the social media outlet that is trapping your attention. If you take that away then perhaps fill it in with doing stuff with the kids. There are tons of things to do. This way you are actually choosing immersion>information which will get you out of your overthinking. Sometimes we need help from the outside. Individual activity can be detrimental at times. Scrolling social media is certainly an individual activity.
 
Ejd said:
I'm sorry your recovery is taking so long. Life is funny sometimes. For me I could not just drink less. I would cut back and eventually be back to drinking almost every night. I didn't get drunk every day, but needed a drink to deal with life. For me quitting completely and AA was the only way. I tried a few other ways first.

Good luck and feel better. Make sure you talk to your friends and family. Don't isolate your self.
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Funny you say that. I don't get blackout drunk ever but do medicate to stop my overactive brain before bed. I do have a dr appt soon.
 
The Kalmyk said:
I would turn my back on politics and the social media outlet that is trapping your attention.
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100% this. Take a break from social media, and stop posting/arguing about Trump and politics on here.

Dave Taylor said:
I still drink but no more than 1-2 beers 3-4 times a week.
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Have you tried drinking NA beers instead? You can't really be feeling much effect from 1-2 real beers, so it's probably more psychological. There are some fake IPA's that are surprisingly awesome nowadays.

Sorry to hear about the head injury. I'm sure it's tough to not be able to ride as much and do the things you want to do.
 
Sorry to hear about your injury and ongoing related issues.

Like others have said, take a long break from social media. Take the app(s) off of your phone. Sure, it's entertaining and serves as a quick dopamine hit, but there's absolutely nothing of substance to social media. It's the equivalent of junk food. It forces you to compare your everyday life to the carefully fabricated highlight reels of everyone you follow. 100% recipe for disaster and completely unhealthy.

Alcohol is tricky due to the potential for physical dependence. I never had that kind of a problem with it, but when I started going through my divorce I got rid of alcohol completely for like 6 months. And I noticed a huge improvement in both my physical and mental health. My mindset at the time was "Well, this is going to be difficult enough, no sense in poisoning myself and make it worse". Of course this isn't as easy for people that develop a physical dependence, but that mindset really helped me ditch it.

Have you tried things like mindful meditation and/or yoga? Seriously. Mindful meditation is a simple practice that you can do every day and there are many guided apps to help you do it. Nothing religious or spiritual if that's not your thing, but it helps keep a healthy, pragmatic mindset especially in the face of tremendous adversity.
 
JimN said:
100% this. Take a break from social media, and stop posting/arguing about Trump and politics on here.



Have you tried drinking NA beers instead? You can't really be feeling much effect from 1-2 real beers, so it's probably more psychological. There are some fake IPA's that are surprisingly awesome nowadays.

Sorry to hear about the head injury. I'm sure it's tough to not be able to ride as much and do the things you want to do.
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Not a fan of NAs. Have tried several.
 
sundaydoug said:
Sorry to hear about your injury and ongoing related issues.

Like others have said, take a long break from social media. Take the app(s) off of your phone. Sure, it's entertaining and serves as a quick dopamine hit, but there's absolutely nothing of substance to social media. It's the equivalent of junk food. It forces you to compare your everyday life to the carefully fabricated highlight reels of everyone you follow. 100% recipe for disaster and completely unhealthy.
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Yup, it basically fragments your reality
 
Dang sorry to hear, circling back to another thread, it sounds like you have quite a wealthy life, it’s physically (and as a result mentally) where you are now struggling. Those will come with time, even if it feels like a glacial pace.

Have u looked into medicinal THC? Used responsibly at proper dosages it can be way more effective than alcohol for the reason you are using it. Calm the mind, reduce anxiety, stop focusing on negatives, etc. I know many people who’ve gone this route, cut out alcohol almost completely. They literally only have a drink once in a while for enjoyment, not any other reason. And they have one drink, that’s it, they don’t need more cuz they had their “snack or their “reward” kinda like that indulgent dessert you know ain’t good for you but once in a while is healthy for overall mental well-being. Obvi consult a medical professional yadda yadda yadda and what not cuz I surely ain’t no doc.

I suffered a very nasty concussion in college that took me a long time to recover from. And then of course I had several more after that. Haven’t had any I’m aware of in a long time, but the point is recovery can be very slow. Frustratingly.

The good news is as you fight thru the motivational funk of doing the physical activities, it will be a self fulfilling cycle of improvement. The more active you get, the better you’ll feel, the more active you’ll become, lather, rinse, repeat. Just be patient and don’t force anything, it will come.

And while I have no personal experience nor do I know anyone who does, micro dosing psychedelics in the supervision of a medical professional is supposedly quite transformative. At least look into these alt solutions.

If interested DM, happy to provide way more details privately.
 
rjr44 said:
Dang sorry to hear, circling back to another thread, it sounds like you have quite a wealthy life, it’s physically (and as a result mentally) where you are now struggling. Those will come with time, even if it feels like a glacial pace.

Have u looked into medicinal THC? Used responsibly at proper dosages it can be way more effective than alcohol for the reason you are using it. Calm the mind, reduce anxiety, stop focusing on negatives, etc. I know many people who’ve gone this route, cut out alcohol almost completely. They literally only have a drink once in a while for enjoyment, not any other reason. And they have one drink, that’s it, they don’t need more cuz they had their “snack or their “reward” kinda like that indulgent dessert you know ain’t good for you but once in a while is healthy for overall mental well-being. Obvi consult a medical professional yadda yadda yadda and what not cuz I surely ain’t no doc.

I suffered a very nasty concussion in college that took me a long time to recover from. And then of course I had several more after that. Haven’t had any I’m aware of in a long time, but the point is recovery can be very slow. Frustratingly.

The good news is as you fight thru the motivational funk of doing the physical activities, it will be a self fulfilling cycle of improvement. The more active you get, the better you’ll feel, the more active you’ll become, lather, rinse, repeat. Just be patient and don’t force anything, it will come.

And while I have no personal experience nor do I know anyone who does, micro dosing psychedelics in the supervision of a medical professional is supposedly quite transformative. At least look into these alt solutions.

If interested DM, happy to provide way more details privately.
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I have my crane license and cdl so unfortunately none of those are an option.
 
Dave Taylor said:
I have my crane license and cdl so unfortunately none of those are an option.
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Dunno if you have kids or not of have the time to do so, but bar none the best medicine/therapy I get almost daily is coaching either of my kids teams in the multiple sports they do. All of these are volunteer positions and I do well enough that I wouldn’t need the money from coaching, but boy no matter how lousy a day I’m having, or how big some ultimately minor problem seems, 5 minutes into a practice or game and I could not be happier. It’s always a total mental reboot/reset that grounds me.

That said 90 minutes to puck drop for my little lady.
 
Dave Taylor said:
Some of you know, some of you don't. I had a pretty bad head injury in September. Initially I didn't think it was that bad but after this long winter the positives are BARELY outweighing the negatives. Long story short, I fainted at home and hit my head full force on a hardwood floor and got knocked out for around 5 minutes. Hospital trip, broken orbital floor and a concussion. I think this one is hitting me hard because I have had several concussions in the past, one very severe in 2001.

I will list the positives as there are many, but some pretty heavy negatives that weigh in here.

Positives: I have a great family. I have a great job. I am doing very well financially. I am typically a positive person. Tuesday TMB starts this week.
Negatives: General fatigue since accident. Tough to do what I love(cycling). Have all the gym and exercise equipment I need but can't motivate more than 1-2 hours per week. Difficult to take my mind off negatives. I have been more of a gaslighter on social media despite not really having a solid opinion on politics.

I'll finish with, I'm just feeling off and would like some thoughts/suggestions. I still drink but no more than 1-2 beers 3-4 times a week. I've gone to an AA meeting or two recently and found some positives. I don't feel I drink too much but I feel I can't stop cravings if I want an off day. I'm reading some books thanks to friends (Quit drinking without willpower). I'm sure my job in NJ is stressful but at the same time my boss has given me a great assurance of job security when not many have that. Thanks for reading.
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Social Media definitely doesn't help. I deleted 900+ people off Facebook and blocked anyone or anything political/negative on IG. It's taken quite a long time, probably close to a year, but it's really helped focus my attention onto the things I want to care about. I sit on the couch and watch my wife go ballistic while scrolling through Elon and Trump's absurdity, and I'm glad to have cut it out. It helps for sure.
 
Hey DT - on a positive, you are attempting to step back and analyze yourself. You are seeking out solutions, medical and otherwise.
You are trying different combinations, listing what is working, what is problematic.
So many can't do that.

between your moto career, very successful MTB racing, and working on/with some really cool equipment, it has to be hard now to get it somewhat dialed back.
type A, high energy/adrenaline person and all. That is what the TMB A-Ride is all about.

I'm sure some professional assistance in identifying tools to quiet your mind is a good start.
Don't let the external forces mess with ya - keep it moving forward in your own, personal way.
 
A lot of good advice from your friends. All you need is try to stay positive. I have had a few injuries over the years, so job related. In 22 it was 2 injuries back and carpal tunnel surgery. Just recently it was on the road ride and somebody didn't call out a big log while I was tuck in behind. This took a while to get my head straight and to forgive my friend, The hardest part for me was to get over riding with my 40 and 50 something friends. I went to the gym after PT for my separated shoulder. Two weeks ago got back on the MTB, have had 6 rides since then and going to the 6 times in the same time. My wife sees a big change, and mentally feel great, I have one recovery day a week but I am retired with all the time not working. So, you have to figure out what will work for you, make a plan and stick to it.
 
Patrick said:
Hey DT - on a positive, you are attempting to step back and analyze yourself. You are seeking out solutions, medical and otherwise.
You are trying different combinations, listing what is working, what is problematic.
So many can't do that.

between your moto career, very successful MTB racing, and working on/with some really cool equipment, it has to be hard now to get it somewhat dialed back.
type A, high energy/adrenaline person and all. That is what the TMB A-Ride is all about.

I'm sure some professional assistance in identifying tools to quiet your mind is a good start.
Don't let the external forces mess with ya - keep it moving forward in your own, personal way.
Click to expand...
Listening to “quit drinking without willpower” currently.
 
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