OFFICIAL: 2019-2020 mtbNJ.com Fantasy Football League Thread - MY FAVORITE TIME OF THE YEAR, GUAC CUP AND GOLDEN TURD LETS DO IT BABY

Patrick

Overthinking the draft from the basement already
Staff member
Oh Commish, rest assured, all your hard work does not go unnoticed. I've been caught in the vortex/black hole/quagmire of that damn OOS thread and couldn't get out.

Anyone in need of a running back? I have five running backs ranked in the top 35, according to our website. Looking for an equally valued WR.

Aaron Jones - ranked 3
Chris Carson - ranked 9
David Montgomery - ranked 24
Tevin Coleman - ranked 29
Ronald Jones - ranked 35

I'd actually prefer to trade one of my two top 10 ones, and keep the lower-ranked running backs.....

hmm...just hmmm.
 

elzoller

El Guac-Oh
giphy.gif
 

Pearl

THIS CHANGES EVERYTHING
during TNF i had to laugh they showed all the clips of the "knock on wood if ya with me" from john gruden, thought that was pretty funny
 

Norm

Mayor McCheese
Team MTBNJ Halter's
So I'm in Orlando today through Wednesday.

And I considered going to see the Orlando Magic game against the Pacers. Just so I could watch both Magics lose in the same day, in Orlando.

But I skipped it, because I think seeing one a day is plenty.
 

UtahJoe

Team Workhorse
Team MTBNJ Halter's
Well that was an interesting evening....Once again our asleep at the wheel commissioner glosses over the Monday night miracle situations....I'll recap mine vs @elzoller
LSN +8 with my QB vs Guacs kicker.....My QB vs one of the worst pass defenses in football....Shit by the middle of the first quarter...Im making my lunch for today and walking around my kitchen
source.gif


JImmy g is cruising, hawks are getting RUN OVER and i figured i;d be asleep by half time. Then pretty boy takes a sack fumble and loses 2 points...ah whatever..
giphy.gif


So its 10-7 now...maybe ill just turn it on in the second half for a little bit

The next 3 drives for SF go like this......
Turnover on down
Jimmy G INT
Jimmy G fumble

So now not only has my shitbag of a QB not gotten me any point throwing the ball...HES ACTUALLY LOST ME 5 FREAKING POINTS in the span of about 4 minutes.

giphy.gif


My 8 point lead on Guac is now dwindling as SF kicks 2 more FGs and an XP....as the game is tied and going to OT

So I take a look and its 88.6 to 84.7

giphy.gif


meaning I now have a 3.9 pt lead on guac....

Ok so now its after 11 and im into this game...and it was a good game....but seattle wins the toss in OT....Right down the field...This should be over.....BUT THEN MR MVP THROWS A PASS MY 5 YEAR OLD COULD HAVE PICKED OFF....

SF ball, need FG to win.....they go right down the field and of course pretty boy cant get them past the 30 yards line, so the FG will be over 40 yards....
giphy.gif


Right about this time my wife comes home from a 14hr shift in the ER and she is wondering why
A. what the hell am I doing still awake?
B. why the fuck is there football on my TV?

Im like dear...i know you been working and shit and just want to unwind, BUT ZOLLER AND I ARE LOCKED IN A DEATH BATTLE HERE......YOU UNDERSTAND RIGHT?
giphy.gif


So if SF makes the FG I lose by 0.1 points!!!! Which hey our commissioner finally woke up and texts me this news as if I wasnt glued to the set already.....
giphy.gif


By some miracle Chase McLaughlin (who will today be taking your order at starbucks again) shanked this one straight into downtown Santa Clara

whew...that was CLOSE
giphy.gif


I ALMOST send @elzoller a premature "Buenas Noches" ......Anyway...The Nannies survive another firing on only 7 players....
 

elzoller

El Guac-Oh
Well that was an interesting evening....Once again our asleep at the wheel commissioner glosses over the Monday night miracle situations....I'll recap mine vs @elzoller
LSN +8 with my QB vs Guacs kicker.....My QB vs one of the worst pass defenses in football....Shit by the middle of the first quarter...Im making my lunch for today and walking around my kitchen
source.gif


JImmy g is cruising, hawks are getting RUN OVER and i figured i;d be asleep by half time. Then pretty boy takes a sack fumble and loses 2 points...ah whatever..
giphy.gif


So its 10-7 now...maybe ill just turn it on in the second half for a little bit

The next 3 drives for SF go like this......
Turnover on down
Jimmy G INT
Jimmy G fumble

So now not only has my shitbag of a QB not gotten me any point throwing the ball...HES ACTUALLY LOST ME 5 FREAKING POINTS in the span of about 4 minutes.

giphy.gif


My 8 point lead on Guac is now dwindling as SF kicks 2 more FGs and an XP....as the game is tied and going to OT

So I take a look and its 88.6 to 84.7

giphy.gif


meaning I now have a 3.9 pt lead on guac....

Ok so now its after 11 and im into this game...and it was a good game....but seattle wins the toss in OT....Right down the field...This should be over.....BUT THEN MR MVP THROWS A PASS MY 5 YEAR OLD COULD HAVE PICKED OFF....

SF ball, need FG to win.....they go right down the field and of course pretty boy cant get them past the 30 yards line, so the FG will be over 40 yards....
giphy.gif


Right about this time my wife comes home from a 14hr shift in the ER and she is wondering why
A. what the hell am I doing still awake?
B. why the fuck is there football on my TV?

Im like dear...i know you been working and shit and just want to unwind, BUT ZOLLER AND I ARE LOCKED IN A DEATH BATTLE HERE......YOU UNDERSTAND RIGHT?
giphy.gif


So if SF makes the FG I lose by 0.1 points!!!! Which hey our commissioner finally woke up and texts me this news as if I wasnt glued to the set already.....
giphy.gif


By some miracle Chase McLaughlin (who will today be taking your order at starbucks again) shanked this one straight into downtown Santa Clara

whew...that was CLOSE
giphy.gif


I ALMOST send @elzoller a premature "Buenas Noches" ......Anyway...The Nannies survive another firing on only 7 players....
T
t

this is freaking awesome!!! What a great write up. E

It was a fucking emotional night. But as always (at least this season) stars do not align for the Guac


258E70B7-90D7-4362-A757-56DE8083DB03.jpeg
 

Pearl

THIS CHANGES EVERYTHING
hella late on this, my bad. going to wing this without my special calculator i made so f it



WEEK 11 POWER RANKINGS


1. @UtahJoe London Silly Nanies (9-1)
The Nanies risked the biscuit with no kicker and flex and somehow still won. Like, WTF?

2. @stb222 Long Duck Dongs (7-3) +1
Kevy had Ms. Cleo telling him which waiver wire would blow up, KIRK WITH A THIRTY BURGER FTW

3. @oobaa47 Dead Sailors (6-4) +3
The OOSer keeps having dominating weeks and finally is #1 in PF. Everything is clicking at the right time.

4. @Chris26er Bandicoots (4-5)
The 'coots didn't do anything wrong, winning, putting up 122, but will stay at number 4.

5. @Magic the Gathering (5-5) -3
105 points would have beat a lot of people, but not the Nips.

6. @Norm Hippo Nipples (5-5) +2
The Nips are perking up over here and slotting into the 5-5 playoff race battle.

8. @Pearl Zekes Chubby Johnsons (5-5) +1
100 points and a hard loss that stings after staying up all night watching MNF. Putting up 100 actually moves me up against the other losers.

7. @Patrick Mariani Sauce (4-6) -2
Barely breaking into the 70s? Thankfully the rest of the teams after this one suck so bad that the fall from #5 stops rather quickly.

9. @jShort Shorties (5-5) -1
2 high score weeks, 2 bottom score weeks. If this is the pattern, next week they will put up a buck seventy.

10. @Carson (2-8)
Grabbing their second win of the season against the new POS team of the league, Hows it feel?

11. @elzoller Guac-Oh (2-8)
Zoller had a chance to get back to his winning ways to a team already locked into the playoffs and just limping through their bye week, but nope, coming up short, again.

12. @jmanic Pocket Dogs (5-5)
Make the bleeding stop! When will this team get back on track?


DA PLAYOFF RACE
Screen Shot 2019-11-14 at 1.58.08 PM.png


Da nanies are really just playing out the rest of the year, while DS and LDD need to really screw the pooch and have miracles happen to miss the playoffs. With 6 teams at 5-5, it's really anyones game for the last 3 playoff spots. Somehow, The Mariani Sauce are still mathematically in it and could be the third seed?

DA STANDINGS

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