The Most Useless Thread on MTBNJ

Johnny Utah

Well-Known Member
So, some of you are aware of my dog thread:

There is a reason why I could not bring the dog back to the said owner.

Let me ask how some of the other members may proceed, I think I made the correct choice, others may have been more brash.

Judging by the relationship the dog owner has with the dog, he does not make wise decisions.

As I pedaled back into the woods from the service road/parking lot I noticed the dog owners car as well as a second car that I used to see when he walked the dog with a girl (who is extremely attractive I may add).

Knowing I may run into the dog, I took a very tight twisty trail to the left of the main trail (gets me out of the park and back to my house as quickly as possible) in order to avoid it.

As I pull into the tight trail I accelerate quickly, as it is tight and fun (no pun intended). Around the first turn I noticed the trail is blocked ahead, blocked with something my head immediately noticed is not natural in the environment.

Grabbing a tree facing forward, with pants pulled down and ass stuck out: said girlfriend stared at me in shock........In order to see what was going on said dog owner removed his face out of said ass to see what was coming down the trail.

I just stopped, spun the bike around and said nothing.

Of course the dog then was in full pursuit.


Well-Known Member
Team MTBNJ Halter's
Hahaha, that's awesome. I would have turned around as well.

However, I once came upon a similar situation at Jungle. I was riding along and came upon a couple that were both facing the same direction, which was facing away from me. They were doing it right on the trail, they couldn't even walk a few feet off to the side. I would have just turned around, but I came upon some random dudes from NYC in the lot and offered them a tour. One of the dudes caught up to me and saw what I saw. I stopped pretty far back from the action, and the couple still had no idea. Before I could suggest turning around, the one dude I was riding with cleared his throat loudly, and the couple turned their heads and looked like deer in the headlights. They stopped, got situated, and walked a few feet off the trail. We rode past them while they kept their back turned, and the dude actually pointed out at something in the distance, as if he and his girl were just out on a hike l0oking out in the distance as if we didn't just catch them in the act.
I think if I did it would have been the MMA fighter and dog following. Only if I had a go-pro.
haha another good reason to have a gopro. Last month on a road ride I stopped at Otto's farm parking lot to eat a power bar and take a piss - I'm sitting on the bleachers eating and notice the only car in the lot is rocking. A young couple were going at it!


Well-Known Member
Well this explains it all, he's just too busy thinking about next time to bother caring about the dog. Also, ya can't have the dog there on a leash while that's going on.