I'M NOT SORRY!

MissJR

MissJR

not in the mood for your shenanigans
Team MTBNJ Halter's
i know i'm guilty of this and i'm totally trying to stop apologizing for being slow (or whatever) and i know some ladies have started rides with saying "NO APOLOGIES!" to try to combat this mentality. i also hear the WBCS ladies make you stop and do push ups every time you say sorry... which would totally get me to stop apologizing real quick!

just thought this blog post was good and wanted to share. :)

http://www.sydschulz.com/mountain-biking/stop-saying-sorry
 
Why is this in the female rider section?
As a noob, I totally relate.

Good article and thank you for posting it!
 
Love it.
Although I must admit I stopped saying sorry a long time ago, but sometimes I still make excuses.
 
I agree that that this doesn't need to be specific to the ladies. It simply applied to anyone feeling that need to apologize.

I will also add that if you feel a constant anxiety about bringing up the rear of the group, you should find better people to ride with.
 
C8N said:
Why is this in the female rider section?
As a noob, I totally relate.
Click to expand...

well, i put it in the ladies section because, frankly, i don't really hear men apologizing on rides. but you're right... it's not gender specific.
 
I flip it. When I slow people down because I'm such a chump mtb rider, I start singing

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MissJR said:
well, i put it in the ladies section because, frankly, i don't really hear men apologizing on rides. but you're right... it's not gender specific.
Click to expand...
It was kind of a rhetorical question... just because it was a good article. Thanks again for posting!
:thumbsup:
 
Have to agree with Ben and AM if you have to say sorry you need to ride with other people...
Although we always get that one person guy or girl that says "sorry" on the beginner rides...
 
I don't think I'm coming away with the same take on the subject. The "need" to say "sorry" is the expression of internal pressure, not the result of external pressure. For some, saying "Sorry" is a automatic reflex response, like saying "um" or "like" and not an actual apology for an imagined slight or offense. While both sexes do it, in my albeit limited experience, the percentage of women who exhibit that reflexive response outweigh the males by a fair margin. Not enough to be able to quantify with any certainty, but enough to notice. The reason? Don't know, but I'd be willing to wager a fair sum on it being a learned behavior, most likely rooted in societal pressure to conform to some archaic preconceived social constraints.

Wow, that was boring. I'd apologize for wasting your time..... But Kev would quickly point out just how flawed my post is, was...whatever..... So I won't.

Any hoooo. Whichever camp you're in, be you and forget the A-Holes; surround yourself with decent people. The A-holes have enough company already.
 
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Thank you for being a friend....I'll stop here.

In all seriousness, this is good stuff. I don't think it's bad to mention speed/expectations at the start of a ride, and however it's socially easiest for you is fine, even if that's a single "sorry if I'm going to slow the group down". However I don't think the ladies should feel the pressure of being "the slow girl" which is what this is article is speaking to. Most of the ladies I've ridden with have been faster/better than me so that's a silly thought process (in my experience anyway). Most group rides I've been on are super chill and nobody is looking to get mad at slower riders, female or male. But this is from a male perspective so who knows if I get it 100%? or even 40%

The habitual sorryists are a another story, and I know 2 women and 1 guy at work who are like that. It's noticed, and I think it's more of a social/personality thing as @Juggernaut mentioned.
 
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